A: Elon! Elon!
B: What? What?
A: Elon Musk! Elon Musk!
B: Oh, now I got it!
A: Elon Musk! Elon Musk!
B: Right! Right! I heard you the first time!
A: Anyways. Elon Musk! Elon Musk!
B: What did he do? What did he do?
A: He flew to Mars. He flew to Mars.
B: He flew to what? He flew to what?
A: He flew to Mars!
B: Interesting! Interesting!
A: Yes! And let's stop the double lines!
B: OK! OK!
A: Just say it once: OK!
B: OK!
A: Elon Musk. He flew to Mars. He almost crashed and then he got out of his spaceship.
B: And then? And then? Shit, sorry! I mean: And then?
A: Elon Musk. He flew to Mars. He kinda crashed, but he crawled out of his spaceship. And he totally almost got vaporized into space dust when his spacesuit got fucked up when the hard Martian winds blasted him backwards.
B: Ooooo. That's cool! Tell me more. And then?
A: Then Elon Musk walked over some craters and he felt totally high like that time he when he went one toke over the line on the Joe Rogan show.
B: Wow. Scary! That's scary!
A: Then Elon Musk, high-as-hell, looked around at the Mars landscape and it was like when you open up a candy wrapper and all the sugar got crystallized and dried into dust and shit and it's chalky and faded scarlet. And he said, "That's cool. That's cool."
B: Then what did he do, that Elon Musk? That Elon Musk, then what did he do?
A: I'll let that one slide since you switched around the words. Then Elon Musk started to freak out. Because walking around on Mars wasn't like bitcoin and electric cars and all that other shit he's into.
B: Sure, certainly. I get it. That makes sense.
A: He started to freak out and maybe even went pee in his space suit, but he was always quick to think on his feet. So, he sat down. To do some mindfulness. To calm himself down.
B: So, Elon Musk sat down on a crater. A crater on Mars? And Mars looked like an abandoned red golf course?
A: Yes! So, Elon Musk sat himself down to follow his breathing. Then he wanted to Tweet some snarky shit, but he didn't have Wi-Fi.
B: Then what did he do? Did he 23 skidoo?
A: Never, never. Perish the thought. He stood back up and straightened his helmet. Then Elon Musk saw something strange. Something strange coming from the west (or the east or whatever the shit, I don't know if they have the four cardinal directions on Mars).
B: But that cannot be! That could not be!
A: Then Elon Musk saw something strange in the glimmering heat. Was he starting to melt in the glimmering heat? I cannot say. I could not say.
B: So, Elon Musk, what did he see? In the far away haze, in the Martian breeze?
A: Elon Musk saw some little green men! They were coming fast, so he had to run. They had ray guns and they sang like an orchestra of bees. Then they charged poor Elon Musk and he started to wheeze.
B: OK! Then what?
A: Then he started to sing a Bryan Adams song alone to himself. He heard it one time near a Canadian lake. He heard it again in the Martian haze.
B: And the little green men, what did they do?
A: Well, they liked the song, the Bryan Adams song. So, they tried to sing with him, but they still sounded like bees. Then they got bored and they walked away.
B: And Elon Musk? Was he OK?
A: As for Elon Musk, I cannot say. Some say that he is space dust. Some say he's still lost. But that's the last we heard about Elon Musk.
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